We live in a time when they are growing the number of families made up of parents with children from previous relationships either product of an separation, divorce or what is very sad even widowhood, pitifully society through stories and movies for children and adolescents has determined to represent adoptive parents as an evil, selfish or unscrupulous figure without supporting those who strive to represent this very delicate function favorably.
While it is a beautiful experience form such families is important to consider before doing so if we are ready and especially if the person with whom we will join it is also because maturity is required to cope with crises that may arise, as they trafficking in children with experiences and different from those of an unborn child, conceived and raised by the same parents experiences. In this blog we provide some tips that we hope can serve.
1st.- Avoid Take the Role that does not Belong to him: Especially if the child has a living parent and although not live with them but with you .; while our paternal feelings toward them are good and genuine that does not mean that we try to replace their real and less imposing them parents because it can create arguments in children because they are placed in an awkward position and may generate arguments as to who choose to love, to who choose to love more or loving his adoptive father is unfaithful to his biological father, long-term situation that causes insecurity in the child, low self-esteem or behavioral problems. We must clarify the principle that no person can replace another completely, the biological parents will always be the biological parents and the adoptive parents will always be the adoptive parents give you the confidence and freedom to love both differently without feeling or unfaithful, or convicted, or fear.
2do.- Not be Afraid to Establish Discipline: Many adoptive parents are afraid to establish discipline at home because discipline is associated with abuse or humiliation and / or to prevent rejection of their children but instead what you should do is try to teach them and gives them love and their emotional and economic needs are met also a function that concerns them is discipline, discipline is also an expression of love because she will teach principles that still keep their own lives, so it should be keep in mind that the same rules of conduct apply to everyone and if afflict any discipline will also be the same for everyone both with them and with their own children, of course depending on their age
3ero.- Communication Play a Leading Role: Leverage opportunities where you can talk about the important place that your child has at home, they need to be told that they are accepted and loved through gestures, words and actions.
4to.- Establish and Agree with your Spouse the Principles Raising Your Child: Conflicts between couples regarding children occur mostly because both, both the father and / or mother disavowal among them especially when there are children from previous relationships with whom they live; for example, as used arguments "as it's not your child why you do not give permission", or "What you did to my son," etc., which you generate with this type of behavior is a battlefield between two sides; if there really was some (but not vindictive, abusive or physical or moral abuse) misconduct would be better to talk with your partner about what happened in order to improve it, we should note that even with our own children there are times when we have failed and is not to be insensitive but learning as parents.
We know that this hot spring has much more to deepen, if you have any questions about it you can send it to us through our mail or comments.